My Gaze
  • My Gaze

    37.5 x 50 cm. digital print
    1987 watercolor painting and 2002 photograph
    2002

    Early in my career, I made a series of semi-abstract/figurative water colors. Ten years later, I realized they were self portraits, each showing an inner struggle. Most are naked and faceless figures situated in an unstable position among imaginary/artificial floral surroundings. Any tremble of the ground or slight push could make the female figure slip and topple. The balance is obtained only slightly by a tilt of a leg and the touch of toes, buttocks maybe fingers to the ground. While genitals are never exposed, an unexplored sexuality lurks between crevices. Today I gaze at these watercolors and read them as I would a diary. They reveal more to me than gazing at any street in any city or any tree on any mountain. I am inside this room, but outside all others. Painting, like yoga, is a type of meditation with its own belief system.